image supplied by FreeFoto.com
I had the meeting yesterday and we had to schedule a second one to finish up. It was very difficult. We covered his old IEP first. That wasn't too bad. My son accomplished 57% of his goals.
Then we were ready to go over the new one. They asked me what my concerns were and I told them that I wanted to see more academics at his level. He is so bored with what they are teaching him. That is when the arguing started. Every time I started to say something, someone would pipe in and talk over me. I hate that! Really, I don't interrupt anyone in the meeting when they are talking. I deserve to be heard out. I was calm and reasonable. Let me finish my sentence!
After ten minutes of this, I lost it. I was so mad, I had to get up and walk out of the room. I paced up and down the hall, trying to calm down. The principal came out and we talked for a few minutes. She understood and together, we went back into the meeting. She explained to everyone what my concerns were and what I wanted. Then she ended by telling them that "Mom doesn't want to argue about it."
We covered two goals before I had to leave in order to be home before the kids. We have to have a second meeting to finish the new IEP. What really irritates me is that they have already written up a new IEP, with goals. They have done so without my input. So far, they are concentrating on goals like: typing out his name and address independently. Well, right now, he doesn't want to do that.
My son does things at his own choosing. Establishing goals that he does not want to work on at this time is stupid. He is showing great progress with his writing. Last night, we were writing his name on his homework sheet. I helped him get started with the first letter and he did the rest completely independently. I was so impressed and proud. This is the area that he is progressing in. This is the area he is interested in. Why not center the IEP around writing instead of typing?
Oh, and his academic level? 6th grade and above. He learns (when being taught) at a fast rate. He is being taught academics that are 3rd grade and below. No wonder he doesn't want to do anything for them. I'm not giving up. My son's needs will be met, even if it means taking him out of school and homeschooling him.
11 comments:
I am glad to see you are not giving up. Too many times parents just agree with the cookie cutter goals.
I hope the meeting to finish up will go smoothly and that they will listen this time.
Good Luck!!
It might be helpful if you can attend a meeting with an advocate by your side. We were lucky in our school district to have parents who served as advocates to help parents so that they got the services that they were entitled to.
Gosh,I shook my ahead in agreement through most of your post! My son used to be in the CI program(through 4th grade).In the spring before 5th, they tested his IQ and said it had gone up into normal range and they changing his status to LD. All of the teachers/support givers through elementary school were great to work with, but, on a large level, my son needed more. He loves to learn and can grasp material, IF taught. However his reading is WAY below level, This is what is holding him back but there does not seem to be anyone helping him with this. They seem to want tpush him through. Now he started middle school and things are worse. They have scheduled his IEP yet but it should be soon. I am very tempted to start homeschooling him after Christmas. Especially if things don't change! Hang in ther, you know what's best for your son! (Sorry I rambled on!)
IEP meetings can be exhausting! And stressful! It was nice that the principal came to talk to you & stated your case to the rest of the team. Perhaps write her/him a note of thanks. Not only does it help build a better relationship w/them, but if you detail what exactly was helpful etc. you have documentation of how the meeting went. Just in case you need to take it to the next level and go into litigation.
Good luck, hang in there!!
Thanks everyone for the kind words. I am thinking about finding an advocate to attend the meeting. We'll see.
Do you have recent IQ testing? You can use this to show the work is beneath him. Basically use their own testing against them. The reality is that they are supposed to make the grade level academics accessible to him so he can learn what others in his grade are learning. The testing should also show his OT issues and they are not supposed to give up on them but help him ,i.e. writing. In our district the goals are usually written by the teachers before the IEP meeting but they go over them with us and we are add or object.
I also agree that if you can get an advocate to go with you or get some legal advice on the best way to attack them in the meeting it may go along way in assuaging your anxiety.
I am sorry that the school is so uncooprative. Good luck
They don't have an IQ test for him, but they did academic testing last year. Because it was done using facilitated communication, they say it is not official. However, I tlked with a rep. from the Dept. of Public Instruction here in NC and she said that it was acceptable to use those results to gear his academic goals.
I've had really good luck with using a tape recorder at IEP meetings. It seems to hold everyone more accountable for what they are saying because there is a permanent record. I had my son's teacher tell me the committee had pretty much decided not to give my son a code for an IEP when he was in kindergarten. Then my husband and I came in with the tape recorder and we got everything we were asking for. She said she was stunned. I don't know if it will help you, but it can't hurt.
Yuck!! I can't help as I haven't been through this yet, but Yuck! My instinct would be to march in there with an attorney/advocate. Big hugs to you. This must be so frustrating!
IEP meetings are so stressful! Obviously, you're right to fight for your son. One of the things that irritates me about those meetings is that it often feels like the parents are getting 'ganged up on' by the administration. Hang in there and good luck with the next one!
Nothing much to add to what the parents here already said except that I am sending a big hug and lots of love and support your way.
Post a Comment